they say... "CHANGE is good"

Now on some keep it real... im a person who doesnt like change when i find something i like i get in my comfort zone and want it to stay that way so i know exactly whats goin on and what to expect. But all change isnt bad and some change is for the better...

Lately ive been in a big ass slump, lookin for a new apartment, looking for a new job, havent been to the gym in months, trying to handle situations of the heart, chasing day dreams, and still trying to be a positive black man. at times that being positive shit goes out the window and it seems so much more feasible to jus do some shady shit... BUT i try to be coo' about it!

anywho seein as tho' the election was tuesday i promised myself the night before that i would start fresh the night before:

- so i woke up early went for a one and a half mile run and did some calisthenics which i can say i havent done in hella long... came back ate breakfast
- sent my favorite girl a message ;0)
- showered, and got dressed while listening to some Kev Choice...
- i went to go VOTE
- i emailed my resume to 4 jobs
- then to take my grandmother to run her errands
- watched the election until the victor was announced
- went DOWNTOWN OAKLAND to Jack London Square where they had a block party for the election...



there was soooo many black people out there and no one was actin a foo' or trippin it was nothin but love in the air and everybody was just happy to be black... it was amazing!

i kept thinking, "wow! we actually have an African American President" it seems like all of a sudden anything was possible!

so i got back on my grind cuz i fell so far off its not even coo...

i decided to take my music more serious... ALFA-BETA

*click the pic*

and also decided to take steps forward with my logo & graphic design skills...



and the photography company me and my boy "kinda" started...



and a few other ventures that im not gonna get into... but u get the point, this whole thing has sparked something in me and im gonna roll with it.
---------------------------------------

so i say...

THANX MR. PRESIDENT!

they say... "Where do you DRAW the LINE"

So tonight my store had 2 year anniversary party, and i had a good time and enjoyed the people there... BUT!!!...

My ex was there and she got bent outta shape about a situation in the club and decided she wanted to confront me about it, thats coo except i dont do the arguing in the club thing and refuse to let some1 raise their voice at me... well she sure as hell felt it was OK as i continually asked her to lower her tone. Above all it was EXTREMELY uncalled for to pull this stunt at this event seeing as tho' i have other affiliates and people from companies i work with there, quite frankly that shit doesnt look good at all.

I blame myself because i should have expected this BUT i figured i wouldnt ever have to as far as to say, "dont get loud with me in public," cuz i sure as hell dont play that shit!

the situation died down but it was embarrassing as fuck!... BUT please believe i will not be happening again...

So this leaves me wondering... "at what point do some people draw the damn line"... do they keep goin until the other person losses their cool or what?

well i jus wanted to vent!



*this is my 98th post... i got somethin special fa yall when i get to my 100th post*

they say... "BABIES are MAKING babies"

I'm at the hospital waitin for my brothers girlfriend to have this damn baby... im soooo ready to go... inconsiderate huh...lol... yea i know... but shit she got here @ 3pm yesterday...

my little brother and his girl are both 19 (wait, thats actually not that old now days is it) but they are both unprepared but they have good parent potential and the family is soooo backing them...


she ready to pop any minute now... the doctors said she's might have to have a 'C section' so i guess the baby's tranna chill inside there for a lil' while longer... butt shit im sleepy...

on the bright side im gonna be an uncle, yesssss i am legally able to harass the shit out of a kid and not feel bad, annnd i get to jus leave when he starts crying... its weird im the last person in the family to have a kid, and i aint in a rush either... but im finna... oh yea their havin' a boy!

they say... "I'm a FREAK!"

It's prolly true ... anyway during my trip to Diego last weekend while walking around their strip (the gas lamp district)... i decided to go in a sex store and take a gander cuz i havent been in one in years... so i look around he first thing i decide to pick up is a porn DVD, Big Booty of course ... so i eyeball that DVD for a minute then move on... i see some perverted stuff, some gaynesss.. and then i noticed something interesting...

A sex sling annnnd a doggy style strap... lemme save u the explanation...here are the pics... lmao...


annnnd...


These both could be very useful... what do u think?... i think imma get em'.

and i'll leave u wit these 2... lmao...

they say... "i RECOMMEND this"...

I have a new favorite show... these 2 crack me the fuck up... how many of u have seen the show "Man and Wife"



this show is based on SEX, relationships, SEX, commitment, SEX, marriage, annnnnd SEX, oh yea and etc.i n a discussion style set-up... My boy says they've been doin this for a long time but just recently got a show on MTV so i hit the site and its a lil better cuz its uncensored...

If ur familiar with Fat Man Scoop then you know he's half crazy so he rants and raves and shows definite signs of ADD, but none the less he speaks what alot of men think... CUT & DRY!... lmao...


His wife Shanda on the other hand is hands down his better half cuz she's super calm, understanding but smashes when she has to which is often cuz taht foo' is crazy...lmao!... she's sexy too!


here's an episode jus so u can see what i mean... *at 5:30 the topic had me dyin laffin!*


for more CLICK HERE...

they say... "i DUNNO about this 1 "

i seen this commercial over the weekend, and im not gon' front i cracked up (cuz im goofy...lol)... but then oi thought about how this can be taken waaaay outta context, and i think the creators shoulda thought this 1 out a lil more...



i\I took it for what it was... what do u think???

ps. i know smitty aint gone find this all that funny

they say... "SLEEP is FORBIDDEN"

This week i started a new way of doing things...

OKAY... im a big fan of "i wanna work for diddy" and 1 of his creeds is "SLEEP IS FORBIDDEN",

he believes that when every1 else is sleep you could be gettin "something" done that will get you ahead of ur competition...

so seeing as tho ive been in a slump lately and ive been very unproductive i felt that id try the 'sleep less do more' thing and thus far its been good, ive got so much shit done this week and when i do go to sleep i sleep hella good and im waking up early.

As much as i like sleep (lmao) im just trying something different to cure boredom with life.

what do u think???

they say... "i CAN'T be who YOU want me to BE!"...

2day before i walked out my moms house she told me i need to work on my attitude... so i look her in the eyes and ask, "why do you say that?"... and she says, "you havent been urself lately, u walk around with an attitude, and its not the normal you"...

so my response is straight up how i feel, i say, "why do people expect me to act the same way every day no matter what my situation or circumstance is, i mean for the most part i TRY and stay positive but im onkly human, and its no fair"... at that point im getting pissed because this is coming from a woman who has had drastic mood swings all her life, and takes her attitude out on people who surround her (usually me and my brother)... now she has the nerve to come at me wit that.

so then she says that she doesnt feel like she can talk to me, she's scared to say stuff to me cuz i have an attitude, im like what the hell are u talkin about (i didnt say that tho, lol) you dont even be tranna' say shit to me and ur assuming...

now granted my attitude is niot of the normal G-Sweet BUT show me a person who is the exact same all the time no matter whats goin oin in their life...

jus felt like venting... and at this point peopl jus might start seeing a side of me that they really dont like... lets jus hope that aint the case.

they say... "i SEE why!"...

At this point in time i can say i see why n*ggas be goin all bad and robbin' folks... i mean i aint gon' do it *side grin*... but at this point my financial situation is fucked up right now, i try to keep a level head about it BUT the fact that the economy is is bent over a table gettin the business right now doesnt promise that i'll find another job anytime soon.

Lately ive had these odd thought and dreams of me taking what i want and/or dont have i.e. .....
(get rich or die tryin)... lmao!...

What is the average person to do when the economy is how it is... i mean i could get a job at a fast food place *blinking blankly*.... but fuck that i do have standards (not to down any1 who does)... but i aint doin that shit.

anyway this is jus somethin that was on my mind to let all the stick-up-kids who read my blog know that I UNDERSTAND.................................. *thinking*... do stick-up-kids blog???... hahaha... i mean they would have an interesting ass blog

they say... "are u SERIOUS?"

I havent chose to post anything personal in months when i realized certain people were spying on my blog(fuck em its my life and any outsider who reads this and feels a certain way, live with it but dont ever, ever, ever bring any of my blog postings up)... but in not doing so ive been the one suffering because serious things have been on my mind and heart the past few months... this is my oath to myself and my readers (who respond)... i will express myself because its therapeutic and necessary for me to get these things off my chest...

starting with this... because of my most recent situation a certain song has been in my head like fuckin crazy... and the oddest part is im really not all that into R&B music but i had heard this song 1 time when EB posted it... and it jus came outta nowhere and i feel like it fits how i feel... corny as fuck i know BUT... it... is... what it... fuckin'... IS!!!

Jasmine Sullivan- Lions, Tigers, and Bears



chorus:
I'm not scared of lions and tigers and bears/
(No I'm not)...
But I'm scared of... loving you/
I'm not scared to perform at a sold out affair/
(That's right)...
But I'm scared of loving you/
Am I the only one who thinks it's an impossible task/
Why it don't last? Is that too much to ask?/
Why do we love, love?..... when love seems to hate us?/

2nd verse:
Most circumstances I know my fate/
But in this love thang, I don't get the game/
Why does it feel like those who give in/
They only wind up losing a friend/

Just cause I love you and you love me/
It doesn't mean that we'll ever be/
Fly cross the ocean, sing for the queen/
But the most frightening thing is you and me/
----------------------------------------

This part stands out because im finally coming to grips with the harsh reality that i do have a COMMITMENT ISSUE/PROBLEM... i know what i want but i continuously run away from it because im not ready to let down my guard completely, and be with one person EVEN when they treat me how i want to be treated and/or love me how i want to be loved. I have no clue what this stems from or why it is.

Its frustrating and scary to know im 26 and i cant carry out a monogamous relationship, and the last time was the final straw which proved to me that ITS ME thats the problem. In these situations i end up losing friends i care about because i go to that level and in the end i cant/dont commit.

if ur reading this u prolly think its not big a deal and every1 goes thru some type of trouble with the heart when making choices and decisions BUT this shit is soooo hard at this point and i dont know what to do.

*DAMN THIS IS HARD*



*i guess i'll go to sleep now, since the sun is up *shakin' head*

they say... "it LOOKS like i stepped out of a TIME MACHINE"

MNy aunt had a 70's part recently and me and a few friends and fam attended... it was a breath of fresh air, one of those times u wish u were actually alive in the 70's...

im hella last minute so i wasnt gonna dress then it hit me i could just got to my grandparents house and see what my grandfathers old clothes (R.I.P. PAPPY)... turned out to be a great fuckin idea... so here is the finish result...



damn lil d, u got a burt out ass perm bra... hahahaha!

IMO and after careful evaluation i look like a UPS worker, *lmfao*... then at second glance i look like anthony hamilton with that damn beard and that hat...

so when i get to the party i see Smitty wit his get up on and its hilarious cuz the fro-wig he has looks hella real...



dont he look like a militant brotha ready to start the revolution???... lmao!

so later on the night i tried it on... we took hella pics...


hmmmm... i think she likes it!

a 70's super star

i see u smitty, lmao... the guitarist

HAPPY BDAY AUNTY ROBIN...






contest winners!


pimpin pimpin!


even the babies were their in character